War movie review: Vaani Kapoor and Anupriya Goenka get some air-time, but it’s the boys who have all the fun.
War movie cast: Hrithik Roshan, Tiger Shroff, Ashutosh Rana, Vaani Kapoor, Anupriya Goenka
War movie director: Siddharth Anand
War movie rating: Two stars
What do you expect when you spy in two of Bollywood’s most beautiful, elastic bod, Yash Raj?
Bouncing in every frame with Hrithik-Tiger’s combined smack-and-swag? Check. Lavish worldwide locations? Is presented and accounted for. Lots of fast paced chases? All of the war is above, and yet, it is not quite in the field. Not smart enough, and most importantly, not quite new.
Set-up is promising. Agent Kabir (Roshan), a patriot who defeats all patriots, has gone rogue. Former star-stick Pupil agent Khalid (Shroff) is assigned by the chief spymaster (Rana) to track down Kabir, and the cat-and-mouse chase of a man on the tail of another, as old as Detective Saga . The veteran film spies like Bond and Bourne and our brains have to work very hard to stick to new, flashier plot devices, spyfire toys, and yes, deadly enemies. In battle, you can see the twist coming about a mile away.
The stubbornness of the war for the entertainment of the family leads it to a predictable template of song-and-dance, play-laugh dialogue-betting-in-fights, tearful mothers and loving sons. A magnificent Holi dance in the middle of a remote outpost gives our lads, who walk like increased electricity, a chance to shake their admirable booties. But it also makes us close our eyes, which would have been fine if the film were in full-on comic book mode. But of course, it is not.
Hrithik and Tiger are being looked after all over the place, and in their full glory, they are so busy on screen, so torn, so bumpy that the really badass miscreants don’t get a chance. There is no creepy villain that sends shivers down our spine? The detectives would then be playing ring-around-the-rose with each other.
It would require cash-strapped skids to carry artists from places as varied as Portugal to Sydney to Kerala, and there is no stein. But the story of freshness and zing? missing in action. It speaks of h des ‘enemies’, as films in the 70s and 80s used to do; Dated dialogues, which combine ‘al-musalman’ and an watanaparsti ‘, only add to the casual bigotry, which is becoming a common likeness these days.
The girls, as Vani Kapoor as a male dancer, and Anupriya Goyal as an ace code-cracker, get some air-time, but it’s the boys who all have fun: falling off the choppers, Jumping in fast cars, diving bridges, something bloody happening in fi chef-time. Shroff should never join the team with Roshan again; On his own, Tiger is a dancer in a dream, with a jaw-dropping gait, and can be five hundred armed desperate; When Hrithik is around, however, he listens in the background.
The last time Hrithik looked as sexy was Dhoom 2 (2006), also a Yash Raj film. The gold streaks have been replaced with a bit of brown in the temples, but the chic cheekbones are decorated with a few embossed stains, fighting-fit figures in case fatigues-and-glasses and a case-hard look, complete look. – Candy. I’m not going to tell you anything by saying that War is exactly what a franchise is set to be: next time maybe go completely silly comic-book? Now I will buy a detective.
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